Sea Trials for Big Blue

Last weekend we finally launched Big Blue for sea trials.  The heavy, heavy, heavy, weight of anticipation lifted, and a tangable taste of this ocean row was finally on my lips.  I've been thinking about this expedition for nearly a tenth of my cognative life now, and as I talked to some extent with Steve, for both of us it has been far too long. Seeing the boat in the water and feeling her move beneeth us was absolutly sureal. 

In March of 2009 when I went to sea trials I was a young little pup takeing my first waddly steps outside, and as things developed I found my footing.  I read up on other ocean rows, trained myself into a strange delirium where hours on the erg could go by and I wouldn't remember a bit of what I'd been thinking about.  It was around this time last year that I'd gotten word that the trip would not go as planned.  Logistical problems had forced the difficult decition to postpone a full year.  For me, I remeber mixed emotions.  For a few the decition to drop out was quick, for others they held on and slipped away as the rest of life moved upon them.  By last weekend only 6 of us from the original selection weekend remained, but I feel now the crew and outlook of the expedition is better for it.  All of the "newcomers" are delightfull people whom bring a fresh energy to the crew. 

So with fear and apprehenstion lifting, I see two things; I've been relativly shelfish and that just like in all other aspects of one's life; the hard lessions I've been learning of late are the most enriching.  I've been selfishly focused on how all aspects of this trip are negativly effecting MY life.  I'm tired of thinking about myself, and I'm finally seeing all the pressure it's putting on those around me; just hope I'm not seeing things too late to smooth things out.  Financially and morally I've asked for an astronomical amount of support from my parents who have been endlessly supportive.  In fact, I seem to meet staggering support everywhere I turn; from friends, bartenders, crew-mates, even doctors.  Other's excitment for what I'm trying to do continues to catch me off-guard and as we approch the holidays I find myself taken aback by the love, support, and generosity of those around me more and more every day. Counting my blessing may be easier this Thanksgiving than ever before.